***I felt this post from last year describes very much how I feel today. I thought a repost of this entry would be appropriate.
***Random Play
*Maureen Murphy: Won't Wait Around EP
*Laura Marie: Drawn
*Guyton Maurice: 20 Questions
*Mozella: I Will
*Sia: Some People Have Real Problems
*Melissa Polinar: Sound Vault Sessions EP
Last night I caught myself asking God for a Bubble Gum wish. With every thing happening in the world, I couldn't believe I was asking him for such a self pity wish. I was reminded immediately of an episode of Touch By An Angel when Tess says, "God is not a vending machine where you stick in your prayer and pull out your prize." That's so true. I remember as a kid and didn't want to go to school the following morning, I'd make silly deals with God. My favourite one that I can remember was "God, If you make it so that I wake up and it's Sunday again, I promise to be good when it's Monday, okay?"
One of my favourite chores to do around the house is to hang the clothes to dry on the breeze catcher. Doing so reminds me of childhood memories when Buelita would wash clothes out on her back yard. She would hand wash the clothes on an old time washing machine. Then she would hang the clothes on the clothes lines. I remember walking up and down the rows as the clothes would dry. On windy days, the coolness of the damps clothes would feel good against my arms and face. On those same windy days, the wind chimes would be ringing and ringing. It's as though they were singing and sharing their own story. To this day, I hear wind chimes and I think of my Buelita.
Today is another Birthday. I'm a year old yet I'm better looking than ever (<--pure sarcasm). How ever God manages that, I'll never know...but I'm thankful! I'm in my 40's yet my spirit is like that of a teenager's. I remember the growing years where we'd play with the neighbourhood children until it was time to come in to eat dinner with the family. Board games were part of our culture. Riding bicycles up and down the street was actually fun and worthwhile. During summers, Mother would make popsicles from the Tupperware molds.
I'm another year older...but so much younger inside. I'm a responsible adult but deep down the child in me lives on through my wonderful memories. I'm blessed to state that I could never blame a thing on my childhood. Love was abundance. The only thing that is different this birthday that all the others is that I won't get to hear my Father say, "Happy Birthday, Son!". It's been seven months since he's passed on and my life feels somewhat incomplete. Although I've felt that emptiness since Buelita's death. It's a comfort that she comes to me in dreams. I've sensed her from time to time...so I know her love is always with me.
All in all, I'm blessed to be where I'm at in this world. I wouldn't want to be in my 20's. I wouldn't want to be someone else. I may envy someone else's waist size but I wouldn't want to be that person. I'm happy being me. At the end of the day, I thank God for blessing me with two wonderful parents. Like all my other Birthdays, I do not celebrate another year of my life, I celebrate that life that was given to me by my parents & God.
Thank you for the phone calls, emails, text messages, ecards, comments, and the love today. You've made me feel special. I'm honoured to have the people I call friends and family in my life. Thank you!
To all the Americans, embrace and Have a wonderful 4th of July! May Americans and this government wake up and realize that so much of this world could care less about democracy. It's time that the US stood firm and proud again. I wouldn't want to live anywhere else other than The United States of America!
*****BLESSINGS!*****
Current Music: Laura Marie's In Code
Current Mood: Blessed, Thirsty, & Hot!
