Xavierism

The Little Things in Life

Our Baby Ella...She's a True Joy!

***Listening to SomaFM's Beat Blender station.

I have so enjoyed the change of seasons. It seems like it took forever for Fall to officially arrive here in Phoenix. It felt great to finally use the duvet cover as a blanket. Woke up this morning with a chilly feeling and was happy to dig out the sweats from the storage containers in the closet. Ahhh...gotta love the surround wrap of warmth.

This week has been special to my spirit. I have lathered myself a calmness that was missing from my Life last week. Frustration set in last week when a client's database agent spilled water on my cell phone. I was listening in to calls and while I stepped away from this agent's desk, she spilled water on Blackberry. I can deal with small accidents but I can't deal with how things are handled to correct matters. The General Manager of the department basically insisted that I deal with db agent directly. First of all, this db agent was new and feared that she may lose her job. Second, things happen so I didn't think this was going to be a such a big deal. Long story short, this matter was resolved and company has now paid for a new cell phone.

So while I allowed frustration to slowly become a cloud around me much like the cartoon character, Pig-Pen, from Peanuts, I shared an evening with the Mother of a Hospice patient. This beautiful woman is about to lose her only son and child. She recently lost her husband and now she will have to prepare herself for another loss in her life. I could feel the pain of her tears as they poured down from her face. Suddenly the cell phone drama wasn't a big deal. As I listened to her, I felt a calm and loving feeling take over. I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit. Empathy took over my spirit. We spent a few hours chatting in the living room while her son slept in his room. She shared stories about his childhood and accomplishments. She turned to me for support but realized that I needed her just as much.

We get so lost in this jungle of Life. The Little Things in Life seem to be misplaced or tucked away until we're ready to open that box or when we need to escape from our hectic lives. I used to enjoy so many hobbies that I allowed Life to take me away from certain joys. I miss those little things in my life.

For two weeks, I have now worked my hardest during the days. Soon as I head home, I do all I can to complete my work and gather what I need for the following day's To Do List. As much as I love sharing things on Facebook, Twitter, and other social media sites, I felt that I needed to enjoy my private time just as much. During the evenings, I have caught up on emails, reading my favourite blogs, and writing letters. I've also let go of so many things that I will never use again. It felt great to donate all these items to Goodwill. I want to remain real to myself. I've been reading more, listening to my fave music, and working on a business plan for various projects that have been dancing in my head for quite some time. I am getting a big kick out of sorting through all my pictures. I almost burned my pics from the 80's. Those will be forever locked in the Vault of Xavierism!

I'm thankful for the wonderful friends and family members that are part of my Life. I'm thankful to have a partner that puts up with me. Bless his heart. Thank you for The Little Things in Life. They give me more reason to embrace the Big Things in my Life.

Current Music: Lamb's Softly
    Current Mood: Blessed & Happy!

Ella & Kylie Having a Snack while Watching a Judge Judy episode

Ella on 12seconds.tv

Since mid week, I've been nursing a bad cold. I've worked from home and have been determined to stay home bound till I get better. While Rodan is at work, I've enjoyed the company of Omar, Kylie, & Baby Ella. I had to share this clip.

*CHEERS*

It's Been A Good Day

Sitting in the Back Yard Enjoying A Quiet Moment... on 12seconds.tv

***Random Play
*Dave Yaden: Bear Me Up
*A Fine Frenzy: One Cell In The Sea
*Missy Higgins: On A Clear Night
*Tony Lucca: Come Around Again
*Celia Chavez: Sailor's Daughter
*Carrie Catherine: Green Eyed Soul

It's been a good day. I accomplished every thing that I set out to do today. On top of that, I worked in our yard and planted Bangkok Red Bougainvilleas. These shrubs can be seeing everywhere in Phoenix.  It's good to know we finally added more colour to our yard. I ran with 3 miles with a group of friends this evening. I actually passed on dinner with friends to run. Somethin' must be changing within me...and I like it. My Baby, a Netbook, returned from the repair shop. It's running better than ever. I really missed my little toy.

Here I am sitting in our backyard by the pool. Birds are out on the porch sitting on top of their cages. Wind feels nice. Wind chimes are playing their own tune. I can hear the music playing from inside the house. Ordinary wine tastes special tonight. Too bad Rodan is working. Overall, it's been a another good day.

*****CHEERS!*****

Current Music: A Fine Frenzy's Ashes and Wine
Current Mood: Peaceful & Content

Quiet Storm

Today's Lunch: Zucchini Tart and Mango & Curry Chicken.

***Random Play
*Celia Chavez: Sailor's Daughter
*Will Young: Let It Go
*Texas: Red Book
*Jaymay: Autumn Fallin'
*Nichole Nordeman: The Best of Nichole Nordeman
*Morley: Seen

It's been a quiet day. Too quiet. I woke up and the Cockatoos have been giving us the silent treatment. They've been so good. Today's been nice. I worked from home...nice. I made Lunch and cleaned the house.

Sometimes it's about enjoying the quiet moments. I let so much go today. I just wanted to be part of this Quiet Storm.

*****CHEERS!*****

Current Music: Diana Winter's Just A Little
Current Mood: Chilled & Quiet

Questions & Answers

Everyone needs to experience Rachelle Ferrell live.

***Random Play
*Ayo: Self titled CD, Ayo
*Danielia Cotton: Rare Child
*Sade: The Best of Sade
*Rachelle Ferrell:  Individuality (Can I Be Me?)
*Anita Baker: My Everything
*Taylor Dayne: Naked Without You

I have promised myself to blog more often. How many times have I written about doing that here in my blog? There was a time when I used to love updating at least three to four times a week. This was back during my Live Journal days. Since then, I haven't really blogged as much and it's a shame. I'm not the greatest of writers but I enjoyed sharing my thoughts and opinions on life, love, God, spirituality, faith, and music.

I thought I'd answer a few questions that I've received via email. I know that friends from LJ have heard this over and over but for those of you that have been reading my journal since I begain this site, there are things you probably don't know...so here goes?

*What's Random Play all about? I have a 6 CD/DVD player connected to my sound system. Depending on my mood, I usually have music playing while I'm here at home. Friends that come over will usually be welcomed with the music playing in the background.

*You never write about the Cancer anymore. Why is that? Yes, I am a Cancer survivor. I had to deal with Cancer of the Esophagus. Twice I had I battle this demon. I praise God, angels and Patron Saints for helping me get through the most difficult moments of my life. I wrote about the intimate details during that time but once I changed my blog over, I basically continued on and really never wrote about it here on this site. I was on LJ for about 5 years. During that time, I felt so good to write about those times. It helped me to get though rough days. I remember scrapping the bottom of the barrell and having heart to heart conversations with Death. The lesson I can give to anyone after dealing with Cancer is this: If Cancer doesn't kill you, then you're strong enough to conquer anything else that comes your way. Life is the most precious gift. I survived for a reason...and nothing is going to take me down.

*Do you miss your A&R days? Yes! I do. Those were some of the best years of my life. Cancer affected my career at that point. After I was in remission, I was made the assistant to my former assistant and my pride wouldn't allow me to return to that job. I dealt through depression for about 6 months. I was in a pity party mess. I hope to never feel the self centered selfish emotions again. I had to dig deep and allow my Faith to pick me up. Once I found the love for Life again, I realized that I had to embrace Change for the next chapter of my life.

*Why Birds? I love birds! As a child, we always had birds in the house. As a grown up, I love the feel of birds in my arms. For the most part, Umbrella cockatoos are very childlike. They demand a great deal of attention. Omar needs attention from Rodan. Kylie only allows me to love her. I'm her only source of Love. Ella, the Baby of the bunch, is a free lovin' bird. She doesn't care to be touched and pampered like the other two. She prefers to sit on one's shoulder or sit on the small perch close to us. I'll have to post a few videos of my babies. I have included my girls in a few of my 12Seconds.tv clips. I'd love to include Omar but he rather bite me. He's bitten many of my fingers, nails, and my right ear lobe. No Thank you. I'll keep my distance from that one. He worships Rodan. Rodan can do no wrong...so I won't interfere.

*What's with the Music Promotions? Simple. I began to help independent singer/songwriters and bands because I believed in their talents. Little by little, I began working with incredible local and nationwide acts. Now I help book and promote various musicians...and I love that I am able to contribute and grow with so many that I now call friends. It's always amazing to work with musicians early on and watch their careers grow. I'm blessed to work with such great talent. Oh...I do have a few gigs to promote this week. Hope to see you at one or more gigs!

I could go on and on but I wanted to share with you a few simple joys of mine. I look forward to Mass this afternoon. I have many thank you to give to God and angels. I also want to ask the heavens to watch over the Israeli troops as they enter the Gaza strip. Sad that so many innocent people are in the way. May the Terrorists be defeated so that Peace can be regained.

Time for my second cup of coffee. Wishin' each of you a beautiful Sunday!

*****Cheers!*****

Current Music: Rachelle Ferrell's I Can Explain
Current Mood: Calm & Contemplative

A Quiet Evening...

***Random Play

*Dave Yaden: Bear Me Up
*Nadine Zahr: Underneath The Everyday
*Tony Lucca: Come Around Again
*Diana Winter: Escapizm
*Keaton Simons: Can You Hear Me
*Laura Marie: Drawn

Quiet moment at home. Christmas tree and decorations are lit. All three cockatoos are asleep. Music is playing low on the house sound system. Rodan is watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. This is a perfect time to update my blog. This year has been a year of personal discoveries. I knew that personal growth would be an end result but it's good to know that I've found steady ground. There was never a doubt...but it's good to know that I feel the emotional security.

After Father passed away last year, the grieving process was quite a challenge. I found myself evaluating my own life and personal agendas. Somewhere in between, I found myself in fear of success. I've allowed a fence of procrastination to get in the way of my goals. It's only been these last few months that I've felt able to "compete" and really challenge myself.

I'm looking forward to the New Year. New Beginnings. I'm thankful that in this harsh economy, I gained clients for events and consultant work. The music promotions and bookings are going strong. I actually have a few shows that I'm quite excited about. I'll blog about those shows in the next post.

*It's hard to sit across from a wine rack filled with great wines and not have a glass.*

Through this whole process, I have found a few social media mentors that have helped me gain confidence and momentum. Chris Brogan's blog has been very much like a social media bible. I came across his blog and spent hours reading about his moments and advice. This is one blog I highly recommend.

I've been a fan of Gary Vaynerchuk for quite some time. I knew the name but never followed through to learn about him or his business. Big mistake. His enthusiasm for life is contagious. I read his blogs, watch his videos...and I learn. This is another website that I highly recommend to other people that are starting out on their own.

I came across Michael Carrasquillo's blog while reconnecting with friend on Facebook. Michael lives in Brooklyn. He reminds me a great deal of close friend & singer/songwriter, Bronx born, Jennifer Vazquez. I love this guy's honesty and his style of writing. I appreciate his advice and opinions. He's also the reason I actually began to use my 12Seconds.tv account. There are good people all over...but those special people are worth searching for...so find your mentors and learn from the best.

"Christmas time is here..." Every time I see a poor looking Christmas tree up for sale, I can't help but think of Charlie Brown's sad theme song. I think it's sad that we cut down beautiful pine trees only to dispose of them weeks later. Bum boo bum.

During the writing of this post, I took pics of my little angles, Kylie and Ella. They're adorable. I wish they knew exactly how much I love them. Kylie and Rodan share a love/hate relationship. She loved him for two weeks and she's hated him ever since. I'm the only one she'll allow to hold and love. Love...I'm blessed to Love and be loved...by family, my partner, my birdies, and angels & patron saints.

Gotta cut this short. Time to get ready and cozy to watch Yentl. I've never watched this film...so I hope it's as good as I think it will be. I wish each of you that celebrate Christmas a beautiful holiday filled with love, love, & more love!

Current Music: Laura Marie's In Code
Current Mood: Hungry for A Snack

Monday, Monday

 

A Moment with Kylie and Ella.

***Random Play
*Nichole Nordeman: Recollection: The Best of Nichole Nordeman
*Dave Yadin: Bear Me Up
*Danielia Cotton: Rare Child
*Natalie Imbruglia: Counting Down The Days
*Corrinne May: Beautiful Seed
*Tracey Thorn: Out Of The Woods

It's early Monday morning. I've been up for a few hours. I love the sounds of the city during the wee hours of morning. Outside birds are now singing. Our birds are still asleep. Ella did squeak out a "blah" while I was in the kitchen making coffee.

After Father passed away last year, I didn't really have a chance to grieve due to my work. Things didn't really slow down till March. By then, I didn't have to "look" the PR part. I gained quite a few pounds and allowed myself to misery away. Of course, that didn't work. I'm back on the wagon and doing everything right. Part of the reason that I'm finally doing everything I can to look my best is simple...Mother is planning a visit. I've got to look my best.

When Grandma died in '06, it was such a let down to see the whole family and I was bloated like a fat whale. I felt miserable inside and out. I know that I was there for Grandma but it still hurt when family members made fun of my weight gain. Because of that experience, I set out to lose weight and really focus on better health and nutrition. Last year, I felt great. I haven't felt that great physically since then...but I am doing my best to change that. I want to feel and look great. It's so frustrating knowing that I allowed myself to gain a bit of weight. Most of the suits and slacks that I bought last year don't "fit". I want to lose the weight and "fit" into those clothes again. That's my goal. I am thankful for friends that tell me the truth when I ask for it.Okay, I wasn't even planning to write about the weight issue but there it is. 

Since Mother is planning a trip, I began the massive house clean up. Mother is a clean freak. I know that regardless of how much I clean, it will never be up to her standards. Anyway, while cleaning my room, I finally went through the drawer that included many of my Father's belongs. I often would open the drawer and lock it within minutes. This time, I spent time going through those things. My Father used to enjoy folding dollar bills into tiny squares and triangles. As long as I could remember, I never saw him fold a single dollar bill. I never knew this about my Father till after he died. For some reason, the fact that I never knew brought on a huge tear storm. As close as we were, I was angry that I didn't know that. Silly, I know...but all that matters is that I finally cried the cry that was locked within myself.

While at Mass, I had a Conversation with God. I thanked him for allowing me to have a wonderful Father in my life. The blessed memories and tiny folded dollar bills make me  spiritually rich. 

A new day. I feel the blessings of this new day.

*****CHEERS!*****

Current Music: Danielia Cotton's Running
Current Mood: Thankful

Ella and Kylie

I've been ignoring my blog. Bum boo bum. I will post tomorrow morning. Until then, here's a cute pic of Ella and Kylie watching Grey's Anatomy. Omar? He's on his perch sleeping. I don't think he's a fan of this show.

Current Mood: Chilled & Content

Friday's Tidbits

I hate my Big Feet!

***Random Play
*Laura Marie: Drawn
*Alicia Broussard: My Own Way
*Sia: Some People Have Real Problems
*Lovers In Arms: Strength For The Weary
*Namoli Brennet: Singer Shine Your Light
*KaiserCartel: March Forth

I've been up since 5am. I love it when I'm feeling energetic and I am up with the outside birds. I know that Omar, Kylie, and Ella aren't "up and about till 7 or 8am". I'm thankful since I enjoy the quiet morning moments.

*Marathon Training. I feel my legs are slowly beginning to adjust to this running thing again. My breathing is kicking in and it feels good to feel the second wind take over.

*Election. My vote is up in the air. I am not buying into the Oprahama hype. I believe McCain is the better man for the job. I look forward to the debates. I honestly like Gov. Paylin. I look forward to her debate with Biden. I'm certain she'll hold her own ground. I wish both sides would be upfront and honest about immigration. I am against amnesty for  illegals aliens. I also do not feel that they should be given any medical benefits or coverage. We'll see...

On to the weekend. I'm ready to Chill, Run, & Enjoy!

*****CHEERS!*****

Current Music: Laura Marie's In Code
Current Mood: Chilled & Hungry

Ella's 2nd Birthday

Happy Birthday, Ella!